Without your help this book would have never been completed. Next I would like to thank each and every single person that helped me in creating Arsen-my very special group of BETA readers. Your help and support when I needed time to get away and finish Arsen were the best gift you could ever give me. I remember I was on my way to NH and we started texting (I wasn’t driving) about S, M, and A, and the rest is history. Momo, the good sister, you were the first person to ever encourage me to write and put the crazy voices inside my head on paper. Play dates and playtime were forsaken but you never resented me for it, if anything you always seemed to understand when mommy said she was busy “working.” Your love, laughs, kisses, and hugs were my inspiration. J and M, my beautiful children, you can’t read this yet but I want to thank you both so much for giving mommy the time and space needed to write this book. I love you so much and I’m so blessed to be able to call you mine. Your love and support were always my constant and without them this book would have never been completed. J, my better half, my wonderful husband, thank you so much for putting up with me, my craziness, my obsession with my characters, the ridiculous and never-ending hours I spent writing and ignoring everyone around me. I hate myself because I still fucking love her.Īnd I hate myself because when I saw that little girl…Īnd it will remain that way even if I have to make sure I die in the process.Įven if it destroys what little is left of me. I hate her for making me fall in love with her. He has the family that should have fucking been mine. As a matter of fact, it feels as if an earthquake is rolling through my entire body, leaving utter devastation behind.I close my eyes and tilt my head back, going over everything that just happened. I fist them closed and wrap them under my armpits. I look down at my hands and notice the way they are shaking so fucking bad. Once I’m in the middle of Central Park, feeling breathless, I lean against a tree. I turn around and run, run, run, run, run, run… That’s the only reason why I can make myself walk away, make myself say goodbye to my girls, even though it kills me that I’m not the reason behind their smiles. I did the right thing by letting her go, just as I’m about to do for a second time. I know that I did the right thing that day long ago. With the fight drained out of me, I watch them for a couple more soul shattering minutes being a happy family. Straining my eyes, I notice for the first time the small bump growing inside Catherine’s body. To my girls.Īs I begin to walk towards them, Catherine says something to Ben which prompts him to rest his hand on her stomach, and both of them smile at each other with so much fucking love. She looks me straight in the eye and a sense of recognition, of having found myself again, settles in my heart. The little girl looks up and her gaze lands on me.
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